Close but Distant
My wife and I grew up in big cities, so we experienced culture shock as soon as we left the urban area for a more rural feel. Desire for ministry and the edification of the church brought us here, and I thank the Lord for blessing us with the opportunity while providing for us endlessly.
But being a minister in a small town is different in several ways. One clear difference that comes to mind is the geographical closeness of the town, yet there seems to be a great distance when it comes to close relationships. Everyone knows each other in rural towns, but I have come to know that there is a difference between knowing of someone and actually knowing them. This “close but distant” norm can vary from place to place, and in many places with a small population it may be the complete opposite. But the current inability to worship together in our church buildings can perhaps cause us to grow even more distant from each other.
So how does this dynamic affect the church? Well, in the closeness of a small town it can be easy to neglect intimate relationships among church members. I am not saying that this is present in the Lord’s church in small towns exclusively, because it certainly can be a problem found in any area, and it is important that every member of a congregation strives to grow closer to one another through socializing, but above all, through fellowship.
We often sing, “What a fellowship, what joy divine, leaning on the Everlasting Arms!” And I know this song is pointing to the joy and privilege of being in fellowship with God, but that same joy should be found in fellowship and closeness with our brothers and sisters in Christ. The well of fellowship and closeness can be run dry if it is not cultivated or prioritized in our lives. However, we must fight the habit of not growing closer to people because of familiarity. We can know the entire history of someone’s family, assume we know everything about them, and allow ourselves to forget spiritual fellowship. In fact, we can talk to everyone in the town and still feel quite distant from them. So a goal for every Christian, whether they live in a rural or urban location, should be to cultivate fellowship and strengthen the bond between one another.
How can this be improved or remedied? Here are two practical things that can foster fellowship:
Prioritize hospitality and open up your home.
It seems that the art of hospitality has been lost over the years. However, it should not be lost for the Christian. It is an attribute that an elder must have (1 Tim. 3:2), but that is not only for elders. Every Christian must practice this. It is used for encouragement, edification, and intimacy that can assist in our spiritual walk. In fact, the Hebrews writer stressed this upon the conclusion of the letter (Heb. 13:1-2). It may be difficult to do now with COVID-19 prowling about, but it should not be neglected or forgotten. Look for creative and safe ways to have people over while practicing appropriate physical distancing.
Foster fellowship.
Fellowship occurs within hospitality. As previously mentioned, fellowship and socializing are two different things. Socializing seems to be focused more on the mundane subjects. For instance, “How’s the weather today? See the game last night?” Compared to spiritual discussion, these fall short of what fellowship can do for the Christian. Ask one another about Scripture. Challenge spiritual thoughts and understanding by asking what certain passages mean. Read the Bible together. These can assist in fostering fellowship. Fellowship is something that separates Christians from the world. We have fellowship with God but also with one another (1 John 1:5-7).
In conclusion, fellowship is to our souls what water is to our body. We need to have a relationship with God but also with one another. Simply being close in proximity does not mean everyone is close to one another. However, the church should be, by fostering fellowship and practicing hospitality. May we not put fellowship and hospitality on the back burner.
