Lead, Don’t Boss

Church leadership is so weird. As I observe church leadership teams, including my own, I think everyone feels it. Who is the boss? Um, maybe no one.

While it’s certainly true that too many chiefs can cause serious trouble, I find that having zero chiefs causes a different kind of trouble. Individually, it’s quite likely that everyone is a strong leader in their own right, but when pulled together in a church leadership team, individuals may hesitate to act as strong leaders. After all, as a minister, I’m the boss of no one and at the same time, I have eight bosses who inhabit the same level on the organizational chart. This could not possibly be the case in any other work world; it’s weird.

Maybe, like me, there are many things that you love about this system, because it allows for a very high trust work environment with much autonomy and flexibility. The important question remains though: How do you lead as a group when no one is the boss?

My encouragement to you is just to lead, don’t boss. These are two very different things and can provide the freedom to do or say what’s needed without the burden of a title. Jesus repeatedly rejects the human desire for power and adamantly warns against it. From Jesus’s teachings, we clearly see that leadership is service. From my perspective as your communication evangelist, that’s what holds people back. It makes sense, right? If you don’t have the title, it’s going to feel uncomfortable if you’re worried about being perceived as the self-appointed boss. So basically everyone sits around a table, holding back, essentially being polite and deferential.

However, what’s needed is service. Regardless of your position – volunteer leader, minister, elder, staff member – you care deeply about bringing people to Jesus and helping your church thrive in your community. You aren’t power hungry; no one thinks you are. If you set aside the self-appointed boss worry, then you just want to serve/lead. No one needs permission or a title to serve. You are free.

Of course, communicating effectively is important here. Check out these articles to help build your skill and confidence: Own It, Lessons From the Shark Tank, You Can’t Teach Confidence, Right?, Your Silence Will Not Protect You. These articles are all about giving you practical help with those awkward moments.

Another thing. Make people stop you. Yes, you read that correctly. Err on the side of speaking up and taking action. Make people stop you. Now is not the time for deference. I’m not suggesting a bunch of new programs or frenzied, anxiety-ridden initiatives. But as you see ideas, needs, connections, encouragement, problems, or important questions, speak up and take action. Pray for God’s guidance, invite in a church leadership expert, take a leadership class, make some calls, do some research, read some books and share what you are learning. Our church leaders primarily make decisions in groups through conversation, so don’t hold back.

I pray that your boldness will energize your fellow church leaders who are largely struggling with how to move forward amongst the very long and exhausting list of challenges.

At the worst, people will disagree with an idea, and the conversation might occasionally get intense. Good! That’s what needs to happen. If it doesn’t, we are a bunch of good people, but not an effective leadership team. If we aren’t leading, then we aren’t serving.

“Stop serving so much,” said no one, ever.